How To Make Friends As An Introvert: 12 Steps With Pictures
Because, as I mentioned earlier, the wrong people will only leave you feeling more drained and empty. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how my friendships have changed over the years. I’ve heard from several introverted students and readers who’ve gone through similar friendship cycles. It can feel disheartening to accept that sometimes your efforts to socialize will go nowhere.
If you consider yourself an introvert, you probably feel pretty comfortable with your own company. At Rula, we’re committed to delivering a comprehensive behavioral health experience that helps people feel seen and understood so they can get back to feeling their best. If you are interested in learning more about the Mastermind or in creating a community of your own, reach out to me at angela@the-trybe.com to start the conversation. Sure, not all of your friends will be up for skydiving, but with a little consideration for their interests, you almost can’t go wrong. Because this has become so common, almost anything you plan will likely be appreciated by your friends.
Don’t Feel Guilty About Bowing Out Of Plans
Adult introverts often struggle with shyness, social anxiety, and a fear of rejection. These challenges can make initiating conversations and attending social events difficult. Introverts usually prefer deeper connections to a larger social circle, which may also hinder their ability to make friends easily.
But that doesn’t mean all introverts are shy or are always shy. Introverts also prefer to focus inward toward their feelings, thoughts, and ideas than what’s happening outside of them. Especially if you went to school with lots of people your age. Especially if you moved away from where you grew up, or work from home.
Overall, removing expectations and simply immersing in experiences aids the exploration process for introverts. Moving to a new place can be tough, but with the right approach introverts can establish a sense of community. This reciprocity reassures acceptance of differences and commitment to friendship. Compromise by joining some group activities too to maintain relationships. Asking follow up questions as acquaintances share allows the interaction to remain balanced.
I mean, being around people is draining, but having a few quality friends sounds like heaven. Below, you’ll hear from two people, one and introvert and the other an extravert, about how to make lasting friendships. But before we start, let’s define what we mean by introvert and extravert. Some people thrive with one or two close friends, while others enjoy larger circles. Research suggests having at least a few reliable, supportive friendships significantly improves health and happiness. Remote workers can make friends by joining coworking spaces, attending local networking events, or engaging in online communities related to their field or hobbies.
It can take time to find the right balance between creating friendships and solitude. With consistent practice facing fears, reframing unhelpful thoughts, utilizing relaxation skills, and connecting with others who share your interests and values, social situations can become easier. In time, you’ll not only manage symptoms of anxiety, but find enjoyment in social interactions, learning to embrace the authentic you. Building meaningful friendships as an introvert can be challenging, especially when working remotely. If you’re an introverted adult, you might struggle to make friends in a new city, or after a major life change like a divorce or breakup, for example. The good news is you don’t have to change who you are to build meaningful friendships.
- This process can feel daunting at first, but it generally gets a little easier (and feels more natural) with more practice.
- Tell yourself positive messages about your likable personality and valuable qualities.
- Instead, it’s about stepping forward at your own pace in ways that feel both safe and rewarding.
- An online presence can be a great way to make friends as an introvert.
- As mentioned previously, navigating introvert friendships during university years can be challenging for introverted students.
Finding one good friend is often easier (and less draining) than building a crowd of superficial acquaintances you don’t have the time or energy to really get to know. Some people might consider your life severely lacking in social connections — but they aren’t you. Say you have strong relationships with your family and one good friend.
But also be flexible and make yourself available if they need you. If you need a boost of confidence, try repeating affirmations for confidence. Remember that everyone is trying to make friends just like you. Before we learn how to make friends, let’s discuss why friendship is important.
Building social connections as an introvert requires a different approach. To cope with social anxiety, introverts can practice deep breathing techniques, start by attending small gatherings, and role-play social scenarios to build confidence. Gradually exposing themselves to social situations can also help them feel more comfortable over time. Have you ever found yourself wishing for deeper connections but felt too shy to make the first move? As an adult introvert, making friends can seem daunting, especially when social situations drain your energy. Friendship can be especially challenging for introverts when anxiety makes social interactions feel overwhelming.
Meeting New People
And then there is the kind of rapport you can build in an instant by developing a sense of connection with someone you just met. Therapists often help people deal with interpersonal issues, including difficulty socializing and developing new relationships. Some people even work with friendship coaches to explore new ways to relate to others. Friend-finding features on dating apps also offer a convenient way to find potential friends in the time of COVID-19 and get acquainted remotely before hanging out in person when it’s safe to do so. You might join (or even create) a forum for something you’re passionate about or connect with people over social media.
Patook let users filter profiles by interest and comfort level to find matches for slow, meaningful bonding versus barhopping. Platforms connecting people by common passions facilitate relaxed introvert meetups occurring in settings respecting natural proclivities, such as discussion sessions at local libraries. From there, broadening social networks and relationships EasternHoneys becomes more achievable.
Ask Interesting Questions
Identifying your personal triggers is the first step to overcoming anxiety in social situations. Some common triggers for social anxiety include large groups, public speaking, or intense one-on-one conversations. Introverts often enjoy solitary activities, but still require meaningful social connections. The pandemic has revealed the importance of relationships, even for introverts. If you identify as an introvert and want tips on how to make friends and cultivate healthy relationships, here are 5 methods backed by scientific research.
You’ll meet those who enrich your life and understand and accept you for who you are. If you do it too often, they may start feeling like you don’t want to spend time with them. Plan activities that you both enjoy so that you can have a great time without feeling drained afterward. A very thoughtful way to show you care is to reach out on the anniversary of the death of a loved one. You don’t have to say much – you know it’s a tough day for them, so let them know you’re there for them if they need to talk. Don’t spend too much time analyzing conversations or worrying about saying the wrong thing.
People often mistake introverts for being shy or unfriendly. But the truth is they’re just more sensitive to external stimulation and can feel overwhelmed more easily than others. The more time you spend together, the more relaxed you’ll feel — and the more your true self will naturally shine through. Looking back, I realized I often don’t even think to make the first move. Observation and contemplation are my sweet spots, and I’m usually content doing my own thing.
Numerous studies confirm periodic alone time balances the introvert brain. Joining a class or group around a shared interest, like art, hiking, or gaming, creates regular opportunities to interact with people who already have something in common with you. According to psychologist Laurie Helgoe, introverts process the world differently than extroverts. Many introverts are often misunderstood, but science shows that their brains actually respond differently to social stimulation. Human beings are social by nature, and even introverts need supportive and trusted friends who they can rely on.
It’s important to remember that everyone has different comfort levels and that introverts are no exception. One of the most common misconceptions about introverts is that they don’t like people or social interaction and have poor social skills. Introverts just prefer to interact with people one-on-one or in small groups. They find large crowds and parties to be mentally draining and often prefer to stay home instead. Reading any of these insightful books on how introverts can make friends can cultivate self-awareness, spark new ideas, and empower quieter souls looking to expand their social circles.
The ultra-chatty extrovert who parties every weekend probably isn’t going to be our BFF. We’re looking for people who understand our introversion, who can go deep, and who move at our pace. In this section, I provide my top 10 tips for the first 6 months of a new friendship, including LISTENING!!! In this fun article, I present 136 different friend date ideas.
Alleo helps you plan and organize your activities to ensure consistency while balancing alone time and socializing. By actively participating, you can build lasting relationships and contribute positively to your community, nurturing deep connections in adulthood. Meaningful adult friendships are built through trust, vulnerability, and shared experiences. Prioritize consistent communication, show up for milestones, and be reliable.
We’re also saving time, energy, and money by connecting online. Sunshine City Counseling provides some of the best therapy in Tampa Bay through address counseling for anxiety, depression treatment, trauma, Christian Counseling, couples therapy and more! We are based in St. Petersburg, FL and also provide online counseling and mental health coaching. Expanding your comfort zone doesn’t mean throwing yourself into every large gathering. Instead, it’s about stepping forward at your own pace in ways that feel both safe and rewarding.
Reaching out to old classmates, coworkers, or neighbours can feel less intimidating than starting from scratch and gives you a head start in getting to know someone better. Other people seek coaching support and find that a more helpful tool than therapy. It can be scary to be so vulnerable with a stranger, but telling someone, “I really enjoy your company,” gets easier with practice. Finally, if you want to identify YOUR personality type, then take one of these 11 personality tests to better understand what makes you tick.
You focus on preparing the entrée by yourself and leave the class feeling lonely. Making and keeping good friends as an adult can be tough — especially for introverts who might find socializing with new people and engaging in small talk exhausting. But making friends as an introvert is possible with the right approach. When we know what to expect, we feel more at ease — and we use less energy figuring things out. Plus, it takes the pressure off having to plan something new and exciting every time.
Share innermost reflections, strengthening emotional bonds despite distances in a comfortable medium best expressing oneself. Introverts value feeling heard, so listen supportively to share challenges or wins. Offer empathy through hard times, respecting emotional privacy.
Alleo’s AI coach provides affordable, full coaching sessions like any human coach, focusing on adult friendship strategies for introverts. By engaging in these meetups, you’ll foster a supportive work environment and combat feelings of isolation, nurturing deep connections in adulthood. According to Greater Good Magazine, meaningful interactions can significantly improve well-being. By being proactive, you create opportunities for deeper relationships, which is crucial for making friends as an introverted adult.
This trait doesn’t make you shy or mean you dislike people — both common misconceptions about introversion. If you don’t have many — or any — close friends, you might wonder whether you do, in fact, spend too much time alone. If you answered no to most of these, this person might not be the best friendship candidate, and that’s okay. Try not to take it personally (easier said than done, I know). There are many reasons someone might not be a good fit, and most of them have nothing to do with you.
You get along with your co-workers but feel perfectly satisfied to say goodbye at the end of the day. You can make polite conversation as needed but feel no particular need to get to know most people you meet. Linda is an award-winning medical writer with experience writing for major media outlets, health companies, hospitals, and both consumer and trade print and digital outlets. Linda hopes her work will help to destigmatize mental health conditions and encourage others to get the help they need. In college, I learned a hard lesson about waiting for people to come to me.
As an introvert finding friends in a big city, you have a good number of options at hand because you’re in a big city with lots of opportunities. While it may go against natural tendencies, self-disclosing the things that bring you joy or make you unique is essential for connection. People appreciate feeling truly understood through meaningful exchanges versus surface-level chit chat. Overcoming social awkwardness requires understanding its roots and finding ways to gradually replace anxious thoughts and behaviors with comfortable new habits. Toastmasters is a great option because it allows you to start with shorter one minute speeches and work your way up over time. The structured format takes some pressure off compared to more open social situations.
Additionally, niche sites focusing on activities like board gaming, science fiction, or language exchange cultivate interaction through shared interests versus small talk. Websites centering around introspective hobbies provide a natural habitat for introverts. Reddit forums like /r/bookclub allow sharing ideas without physical meetups.